The part that is too often missing is personal awareness as it relates to self-preservation.  You know, the fine art of taking care of one’s self.  In that department, outside of perhaps financial discipline, many contemporary leaders find themselves coming up short… and they pay the price in terms of anxiety, exhaustion, sleep disorders and an array of maladies ranging from chronic colds and sore throats to more sinister stuff.

We live in an age where images of running, biking, extreme sports, yoga and other forms of outlets in which professionals and executives are supposed to indulge are blasted at us non-stop.  TV and the internet are filled with them.  But negativity, anxiety and depression so often persist.  I suggest they persist, at least in many instances, because the manner in which leaders have been conditioned to think precludes taking care of one’s self.  Conditioning, whether obtained in school or on the fast track, to anticipate the worst and to remain fixed on potentially catastrophic outcomes keeps leaders stuck in a world of negative manifestation.

A tool we utilize in coaching senior executives, business owners and professionals is what we generically call “best possible thought in the moment” methodology.  This is something rarely taught in MBA classes.  Organizations seldom hold seminars on it.  It comes up as a Boardroom topic only where superb leadership with high levels of self -awareness is clearly in charge.  Nevertheless, it is a critical tool for leaders navigating the stormy waters of today’s stressful work environments.

At its core, best possible thought in the moment methodology consists of changing the internal dialog we have with ourselves.  So often, when things don’t go as planned, we begin telling a story to ourselves.  The stories are frequently negative in nature.  We hold ourselves in contempt.  We hold others in contempt.  We curse the conditions that caused the problem to arise.  Then we search frantically for a solution, clocking ourselves against what we feel is an acceptable amount of time to cycle through anything from being stuck in a traffic jam to curing every disease known to man.  Do you get the picture?

When we tell ourselves a negative story, over and over, negativity is exactly what we get back.  We feel worse.  The cycle is almost impossible to break, unless the shining solution to the problem immediately surfaces.  And, contrary to traditional thought, worrying, suffering and obsessing over problems rarely results in solutions, or the best possible solutions.

There’s a better way to approach problems.  What if you observed the story you’re telling yourself, almost as a casual bystander?  Then, after observing the powerfully negative aspects of the story you’ve invented, you made purposeful shifts from worst case to better possibilities?  It doesn’t mean you’re inventing a fairy tale every time something goes against plan.  It simply means you elect to change the accusing, judgmental, negative and scary story to one in which you are allowed to feel better.  Ask yourself, given the issue at hand, what is the best possible thought you can have at the moment?  What would a good solution look like?  How would it feel? Even if all the components of a solution are temporarily illusive, picturing a positive conclusion is well within your ability.

You will find that as you change the story you’re telling yourself (and probably others) about a particular issue from awful to one of positive possibilities, your ability to arrive at powerful solutions are exponentially enhanced.  You will feel relief.  You will feel better.  Those around you will feel relief and they will feel better.

Our reality is largely composed of the story we tell ourselves in any particular moment.  When we take a problem and make it horrible, the process of solving it will feel horrible.  It might not get solved at all.  When we take a problem and develop a story around it that is designed first to bring a relief-based process for solving it, the chances are great the problem will not feel horrible, the process of solving it will bring relief and an actual solution will more likely result.

As a leader, your job is to take care of yourself and to model leadership traits to others that they respect and can utilize themselves.  What stories are you telling yourself right now?  What stories are key members of your team telling themselves?  Teach them best possible thought in the moment methodology.  Ease them in to the concept of using its advantages every day.  Chances are productivity will soar and maladies will fade.

Take the current presidential election process, for example.  The President and the Democrats invent stories and then bend reality in efforts to justify them.  Then, the President’s Republican opponents invent their stories and do what they feel they must to justify their stories in order to counteract the stories invented by the President and the Democrats. Do you see the problem?  The whole thing is a story.  What we need is the truth. The real truth.  Courtesy of highly biased media, what we get is hardly the real truth.  Instead, what we get is extended stories based on the stories originally invented to sway voter’s emotions.

Now, take a look at your organization.  What happens when something goes “wrong?” What stories are invented to support justification? Are stories immediately invented to place blame?  Does anyone insist on dealing with the facts first?  Too often, organizational life and conditioning emphasizes stories and blame as the standard leadership fix.  The problem is, the method doesn’t work.  It costs organizations the authentic talent they need.  It hampers business development.  It misleads clients and customers.  And it gives leadership the “Office Space” stigma so richly deserved in many corner offices.

Walk in the door tomorrow prepared to tell the truth.  The real truth.  When things do not go as planned, deal with the facts.  Forget the stories.  If you messed up, just say so. You will not die as a result. No one will die as a result.  You can evaluate who may in actuality not be aligned with the team later. The power of replacing stories and drama with the real truth cannot be exaggerated.

Ego aside, I’ve done a fair amount of radio before, and approached this event with a bit of internal dialog telling me I was throwing away valuable time.  As it turned out, I was dead wrong.

Todd and his on-air partner, Todd Youngblood, asked some of the most insightful questions ever posed to me about the coaching profession.  Their queries quickly converted me from a place of resistance to one of careful reflection, and I thoroughly enjoyed sharing with them a wide range of perspectives as they relate to coaching, counseling and consulting with executives, business owners and professionals.

Areas covered in our on-the-air discussion included:

• Who needs coaching?
• What does Resolute Consulting Group do?
• What questions should you ask a coach?
• What are the common issues that executives encounter that potentially lead to working with an executive coach?

Feel free to listen to the broadcast interview.  I hope you will find it of value as you consider the myriad of benefits individuals typically derive in working with an executive coach, and Resolute Consulting Group as an exceptional professional resource.

Executive Coaching
Leadership Development Coaching
Specialized Career Transition Counseling for Executives and Professionals
Handling Behavioral Challenges and Blockages
Strategies for Attraction and Retention of Top Talent
Executive and Professional On Boarding Counseling
Balancing the Work and Life Equation
Stress Management for Executives and Professionals
Leading the Family Business
Succession Plan and Strategy Counseling
Effective Strategies for Organizational Partnerships and Owners
Specialized Wellness Strategies for Executives and Professionals
Intervention Counseling for Performance and Behavioral Challenges
Advanced Communication Development and Strategy Counseling
Personal Branding and Image Strategies for Executives and Professionals

• Between May 1963, when Gordon Cooper flew the last Mercury mission (Faith 7, MA-9) and March 1965, when Gus Grissom and John Young piloted Gemini III, the first manned Gemini mission.  This was a planned interval as transition, test and training from Mercury/Atlas D equipment to Gemini/Titan II equipment took place.
• Between November 1966 and October 1968.  In November 1966 Jim Lovell and Buz Aldrin flew Gemini XII, the last Gemini mission.  The first manned Apollo mission, Apollo 1, was scheduled to fly in February 1967.  Tragically, the Apollo 1 crew, Gus Grissom, Ed White and Roger Chaffee died on January 27, 1967 when a fire broke out aboard their spacecraft, which sat atop a Saturn 1-B booster, during a flight simulation on Pad 34 at (then) Cape Kennedy.  The Apollo 1 fire and subsequent major modifications to the Apollo command and service module systems precluded manned flight test of the Apollo systems until October 1968, when Wally Schirra, Walt Cunningham and Don Eisele flew Apollo VII into earth orbit.
• In April 1970, the crew of Apollo XIII, Jim Lovell, Fred Haise and Jack Swigert, safely returned to earth after the spacecraft suffered a catastrophic malfunction en route to the moon.  The next moon mission, Apollo XIV, did not fly until February 1971 with Alan Shepard Stuart Roosa and Edgar Mitchell on board.
• In December 1972, the Apollo XVII crew of Gene Cernan, Ron Evans and Harrison Schmitt were the last human beings to set foot on the moon.  Within 5 months the initiation of Apollo Applications took place.  These were earth orbit missions using Apollo hardware after the first round of deep budget cutting put an end to further lunar exploration missions. Apollo Applications consisted of 3 Skylab missions and the Apollo/Soyuz Test Project.  Skylab missions were flown between May 1973 and February 1974, and crewed by Charles “Pete” Conrad, Paul Weitz and Joseph Kerwin (Skylab 2); Alan Bean, Jack Lousma and Owen Garriott (Skylab 3); and Gerald Carr, William Pogue and Edward Gibson (Skylab 4).
• In July 1975 Tom Stafford, Vance Brand and Deke Slayton (one of the original seven Mercury astronauts; Slayton had been grounded for medical reasons between 1962 and 1972) flew the last Apollo mission in conjunction with a Soviet Soyuz spacecraft with cosmonauts Alexei Leonov and Valeri Kubasov aboard in the first American/Russian joint space venture, ASTP. It was not until April 1981, when John Young and Bob Crippen flew STS – 1 Columbia, the first of a long series of Shuttle Transportation System (“STS”) missions.
• In January 1986 the crew of STS – 51L Challenger consisting of Francis Scobee, Michael Smith, Judith Resnik, Ellison Onizuka, Ronald McNair, Gregory Jarvis and Sharon Christa McAuliffe was lost when hot gas blow-by malfunctions on the spacecraft’s solid rocket boosters (“SRBs”) caused the entire vehicle to disintegrate shortly after liftoff.  It was not until September 1988 when the shuttle next flew, with the STS-26 Discovery mission and Frederick Hauck, Richard Covey, John Lounge, George Nelson and David Hilmers aboard.
• Returning to earth on February 1, 2003, astronauts Rick Husband, William McCool, Kalpana Chawla, Laurel Clark, Iian Ramon and Michael Anderson, the crew of STS-107 Columbia, was lost when damage to the orbiter’s thermal heat protection system failed and the spacecraft disintegrated.  The interval between missions lasted until July 2005 when shuttle operations resumed with the STS-114 Discovery mission with astronauts Eileen Collins, James Kelly, Charles Camarda, Wendy Lawrence, Soichi Noguchi, Stephen Robinson and Andrew Thomas aboard.

When STS-135 Atlantis returns, the difference between the pauses noted above and the condition that will exist is this: in the past, well-defined plans to return American astronauts to space always existed.  Particularly during the Mercury, Gemini and Apollo programs, the urgency and intent to succeed was palpable.  The nation – and the world – felt it.  Now, as the shuttle fleet is prematurely retired, the sense of urgency and intent to succeed in space are fleeting.  Leadership has failed man’s most noble adventure.  We have stopped leading in space.  We have elected to take a back seat… or no seat at all in the theater of manned spaceflight.  In fact, for the foreseeable future, we will be renting seats on aging Soyuz spacecraft from our once formidable adversaries in space, the Russians, to even get into orbit.  Without any negative connotation on the brave Russian cosmonauts, that condition is disgraceful.

A new program, Constellation, featuring an advanced Apollo concept spacecraft named Orion, was on the drawing boards. Constellation would have taken us back to the moon, established a permanent lunar base, and serve as the backbone of a manned Mars initiative.  But the current administration killed the Constellation program.

Did you read the names I noted above?  Americans gave their lives to see that our space program succeeded and had a lasting future.  I wonder what Gus Grissom, Ed White and Roger Chaffee would have to say about our sad predicament.  I wonder what the crews of STS-51L Challenger and STS-107 Columbia would add.  Somehow, I think these men and women who gave everything they had would feel let down.  Maybe even betrayed. 

Next, think of the tens of thousands of highly trained, skilled professionals who made Mercury, Gemini, Apollo and the Shuttle Transportation System possible.  Do those who made the shuttle fly and still serve at NASA now become greeters at Wal Mart?  What kind of colossal waste does that represent?

Our manned space program was one of the mightiest sources of inspiration man has ever created. It taught us to achieve brilliantly, to reach for the stars (literally) and to dream the impossible.  We were so proud to be Americans. We thought of men like Al Shepard, John Glenn, Frank Borman, Jim Lovell, Neil Armstrong, Mike Collins and Buz Aldrin as authentic heroes. We wanted to be like them.

In this age of vanishing heroes, and leadership that is determined to see America decline, we have rap music and hip-hop culture instead of a vibrant manned space program.  This is leadership’s fault.  Again, leadership has failed. 

In the shadows of the last shuttle flight, it is time to take inventory.  It is time to assess what a vibrant manned space program really means for the nation.  It means technology beyond description.  It means, literally, millions of high-paying jobs for American men and women.  It means manufacturing vehicles that are beyond the cutting edge of what currently exists.

And there is something else. A primary goal of manned space exploration remains essentially the same as it did 50 years ago when the Soviet Union placed Yuri Gagarin into earth orbit aboard a crude but effective spacecraft named Vostok.  That goal is the prevention of rogue nations from utilizing space as the ultimate battlefield against its perceived enemies.   Space is the high ground of the future.   Those who treat it as the critical frontier it truly represents will succeed.  Those who ignore its importance will suffer the consequences.

As a boy and young man, I watched those magnificent rockets, many of them bearing fragile human lives, thunder into the heavens.  I sat in awe as American astronauts and Soviet cosmonauts performed incredible feats.  And I watched American astronauts become the first humans to set foot on another celestial body.

Had we continued at the speed President Kennedy urged the nation so many years ago, we would have gone beyond Apollo and the miracle of its steed, the Saturn V lunar booster.  We would have developed Saturn’s successor, Nova.  We would have been on Mars already.  Who knows what technologies and benefits this would have created? 

We still have a chance.  It is not too late.  But we must get moving again.  America needs a vibrant manned space program.  Who will lead us back on course?

John P. Schreitmueller is President and CEO of Atlanta based Resolute Consulting Group LLC.  The firm specializes in leadership, work and life coaching and counseling.  Mr. Schreitmueller is a former Marine Corps officer. He holds a commercial pilot’s license, multi-engine and instrument ratings, and has logged thousands of hours at the controls of high performance aircraft.  His first book, Of Dreams and Astronauts, a narrative on the U.S. manned space program, won the 1990 Aviation/Space Writers Association Award of Excellence for nonfiction journalism.    

Driving back to my office I wondered how many other conversations just like the one I had overheard were taking place across the country at that very moment. Many thousands, I would guess. And I also wondered how many professionals like Frank were utilizing outdated methods to find meaningful employment. Of that I am certain there are millions.

Is your search for new employment stalled? Are you tired of fighting the down market? Have you found resume after resume flies out, but very little circles back? Consider this: your methodology is most likely flawed. As you probably heard many times, it is insanity to expect different and better results by doing what has not worked in the past over and over, or with greater ferocity. It’s time to do something very different. As I have written many times – and will continue to do so – STOP looking for a “job!” START talking to real, live people who are involved in career situations that you know from self awareness are authentic for you and parallel your authentic work and life goals. Put a story around where you see yourself over the next year and take it out for a test flight. The more people who know your story, the more opportunities you will uncover. Carry your resume with you, but it is you – and not the resume – that will deliver an authentic opportunity to your doorstep.

We weathered the Cold War because, while making many mistakes, we generally had solid leadership in place. From Harry Truman through George H.W. Bush, the United States cocked the fist against global communism while balancing delicate negotiations behind the scenes. And we prevailed.

Today we face a different set of challenges. But the stakes remain incredibly high. So does the requirement for strong leadership.

Consider your situation as a leader. These are challenging times even if you aren’t leading a global nuclear power, as if you hadn’t noticed. The recession many said was over last year continues to drag the economy. Oil prices are volatile due to tension in the Middle East (leadership, anyone?). Lending institutions are just beginning to climb out of their reluctance to do what they are in business to do: lend money, especially to the small businesses that desperately need the cash. Top talent, shocked by the losses of millions of jobs, will for many years regard traditional employment with a jaundiced eye… leaving organizations that must compete in tough markets as recovery takes place in poor human capital positions.

What are you doing that is different in the face of these many challenges? Are you sitting there “waiting for things to get better?” Or are you taking bold steps to lead your organization through the morass into, as Winston Churchill called it many years ago, “bright, sunlit uplands.” Consider:

- This is an excellent time to find those one or two rainmakers who will make all the difference as your business moves forward
- This is an excellent time to invest in yourself as a leader and identify your authentic goals, enabling a work and life strategic plan that actually MEANS something
- This is an excellent time to initiate and build new relationships… with clients past and present; friends; banks where key players have come and gone; suppliers
- This is an excellent time to clean house – literally and figuratively – and jettison the material and emotional garbage that weighs you down
- This is an excellent time to pay attention to your health and wellness, integrating into your schedule time for the self care you have long neglected
- This is an excellent time to reinvent what was “just good enough” before and turn what was average into the extraordinary

When John F. Kennedy stared down Nikita Khrushchev in 1962, it wasn’t because he had all the answers. Only a year before, he had stumbled badly when a band of Cuban exiles, backed by the U.S., were cut down by well-prepared Cuban communists at the Bay of Pigs. Nevertheless, he had the courage to admit he was “the responsible officer of the government” when the inevitable blame game began. He reinvented, adapted and overcame where he knew it was imperative to do so.

You are a leader. Take the initiative. Stare what you fear most in the face and say “no.” You have much more power than you think. You have much more control over your destiny than you imagine. Step forward. Take your place among the real leaders. And see what happens.

This is one of the most common complaints we hear in our coaching and counseling practices. Under favorable economic conditions, a huge proportion of the degreed workforce elects to remain “stuck” in jobs that are, essentially, despised. Add to it the turmoil and uncertainty of a protracted recession (contrary to what Washington tells us, there is still a nasty recession going on out there; too many elected officials are just too comfortable to realize it), and you have the ingredients for anxiety, stress and even depression. A common result: feeling “stuck.”

Getting unstuck involves serious soul-searching. It involves taking emotional risks you may prefer to avoid. It involves communicating with spouses, life partners, children, parents and a host of interested parties, all of whom may feel they have a say-so in where you eventually end up. Ultimately, however getting unstuck is up to YOU. YOU have far more control than you think you possess. And you have many of the tools you need to get out of the quagmire already handy.

What it takes is reaching out to a trusted adviser who does not have a separate agenda based on your professional or personal pathway. I may be biased because I am in the trusted adviser business. But I really don’t care. Fooling around with your work and life equation is about as dangerous as fooling around with your health. In fact, the two are solidly linked. When we are working out of meaning, out of our core, out of our authenticity, we feed our physical being with positive hormones and thoughts. Our blood pressure, cardiovascular system, gastrointestinal system, immune system and our mental health benefit. Positive relationships flourish. And, yes, financial goals are most likely achieved. On the contrary, when we are suffering at work; when we are clearly doing things that do not bring meaning and a sense we are contributing, our health pays the inevitable price. So, you get my drift? If you are feeling “stuck,” there is more risk than just feeling miserable.

Find a qualified coach, therapist or counselor who has particular expertise in career, work and life guidance. Make this a priority. Identify your authentic goals and develop a plan that places you on a pathway towards realizing them. Treat this the same way you would react if your physician told you your cholesterol was dangerously high, the HDL/LDL proportion was way out of whack, and you had to make immediate changes. That would get your attention, would it not? You would, undoubtedly, change your diet, boost your physical activity, and take medication as prescribed by the physician. Recognizing the warning signs in your work and life equation is similar. If you are feeling chronically “stuck,” and sense a hopelessness about your predicament, it is time to take action!

Go get unstuck. It may be the best investment you ever made.

You know them all. You’ve probably used them yourself… recently! You are busy, pressed for time, and cannot understand why others do not behave the way you want them to behave. And so you ask them why. But there’s a problem in this: we cannot control the behavior of others. Lord knows, we try. Many leaders find themselves in a non-stop battle to “get people to do what I want them to do.” Sure, we use compensation, perks, time off, all kinds of things to influence. Or we just bully. Sooner or later, that methodology almost always backfires. And it causes the leader and those around him or her immense levels of stress. That hurts us psychologically, physically and financially.

It backfires because your message is perceived as a personal attack. Then the passive sabotage begins, and you are in the abyss. Consider the alternative, which is taking ownership of the situation and putting the message you deliver in terms of YOUR needs instead of what is “wrong” with the other player. This works at home as well as at the office!

Next time George delivers the report you need 24 hours late, try something like this: “George, I need this report by 9:00 every Wednesday morning. When I do not have it on time, I am in a difficult spot in delivering key information to the Board. It would mean a great deal to me if you could arrange things so I have it each Wednesday morning on time. Is there anything getting in the way of that happening?” Your message was clear and concise. You did not attack George. You took full ownership, and demonstrated to him why it is important for you to have the report on time. And, furthermore, you gave George a chance to explain why he might be having difficulty getting it to you when you need it.

Try this kind of approach in the next 6 instances where you would normally go on the attack. This is not about being cute or fluffy. This is about how you demonstrate leadership. Try it, and see what happens.

I think they would be repulsed. Super Bowl 45′s half time extravaganza did not represent an example I think we wish to convey. It did not convey leadership. Instead, it conveyed a culture immersed in drugs and violence. And that is not what we are about here.

While I am a devout believer in our free market system, I am not a believer in promoting a culture that demonstrates to our children and the global community that the gangster-like world of hip hop is OK. It is not. It promotes aiming low. It encourages anything but leadership. It encourages anything but authenticity. It is all about acting out.

The free market responds to what sells. What if we stopped buying hip hop, rap and its toxic messages? What if we began buying up other types of music and entertainment that instilled in its consumers positive messages and possibilities? What if we demonstrated to those people in Egypt – and elsewhere – that America is about much, much more than overpaid performers feeding poison to our youth?

Think about it. The free market responds. All it takes is leadership on behalf of us all. Who knows? Maybe some Super Bowl halftime show of the not-too-distant future might even feature marching bands and American flags. What a novel idea.